There are so many reasons to swear. It relieves stress, it’s somehow more dignified than yelling “owie!” when you stub your toe, and it just feels cool. But if you’re in situations where you might garner some sideways glances from Grandma, your pastor, or your child’s 3rd grade class, sometimes having a standby replacement swear is the way to go.
Here’s a list of some awesome geeky go-to obscenities that might help keep Grandma from washing out that dirty mouth of yours with soap.
E CHU TA!
This extremely rude Hutteese expression is a standalone statement that not-so-politely asks the subject to do unspeakable things to themselves. C3PO was quite offended when the expression was tossed his way, which indicated how offensive it really is since he’s close friends with an astromech droid whose every word is bleeped out, despite language chips clearly existing in the universe.
Example usage: “YOU JUST SPOILED FORCE AWAKENS! E CHU TA!”
From the outside, the original Battlestar Galactica seemed to be about capes, flowing hair, friendly Cylons named Cy, and a lighthearted jaunt through space. Despite this, the show found itself needing to use curse words on network television, in spite of FCC limitations. Hence, the expletive usage of frak was born. In the modern and highly gritty reincarnation of the show, the swearing became pronounced and the term was revitalized. It’s probably one of the most common geek swears used, likely due to the show’s popularity as well as how wonderfully frak rolls off the tongue with the same punctuated forcefulness as the other four-letter f-word.
Example usage: “My fraking toaster is defective.”
Another four-letter f-word, feth is a curse that is familiar to geeks who love the Warhammer 40,000 novel series Gaunt’s Ghosts, which is best described as Band of Brothers set in the 40K universe. The story follows the Tanith First-And-Only (named after their home planet). A swear unique to the the natives of Tanith, it’s the name of a supernatural spirit believed to possess the trees of the planet, allowing them to move.
Example usage: “The fething tree branch smashed up my car!”‘
Captain Malcolm Reynolds of the good ship Serenity would often use this term in place of goddamn. It just sounds cooler coming out with an old-timey western drawl and when used in reference to livestock.
Example usage: “I can’t go to no fancy shindig; I ain’t got a gorram thing to wear.”
Zarquon was a religious prophet in the universe of Douglas Adams’ Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy. The term is used both as an adjective, zarking, as well as a standalone curse, for zark’s sake.
Example usage: “How did you forget the towels, you zarking idiot!”
Nothing is quite as rich as Klingonese personal insults. There have been no direct translations of the term petaQ, but one can only assume it’s an extremely derogatory term since Klingons value face as much as they value honor, and the only reasonable response to being called a petaQ is violence.
Example usage: “It’s called a signal light, you spineless petaQ!”
What’s your favorite geeky swear? Have another geeky profanity that you love to toss around? Tell us in the comments below (don’t forget to give us an example usage!)
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